} secrets are meant to be unknown :D MEMORIES <#3

♥ Friday, November 17, 2006

haix...12th dae...wat fer?I am

tired...not gonna care.I am sori glenn...

but,i guess i really cant...Gonna shut miiie

self up.Dis may be miie last entry lerhhs.Till

we meet again.Waiting lyk an idiot when

I noe I am juz nothing...Who cares...

miie last post fer euu.read it wif an open

hearrt.Try tuu understand how i feel...

Dun compare miie wif euu fer dis time...

I hate tuu be compared...I dunno y but,sori.

*kor*

I am sori...but,I dun think I can wait any

longer...I am hurting damn badly inside..

does caring n everything i do be so hard??

I ask miieself time n time again...Wat

was it dat is making miie so sick...It is

euu.I miss ruu tuu much.Miie hearrt is

broken...by euu.So near yet so far...

everydae...I tell miieself dat I have

tuu be strong...tuu wait fer euu...But,

wats e point of waiting?I dun c e

importance of miie.I am someone euu

didnt noe or met b4...We dunno each

other.Maybe its meant tuu be dat way.

haix...I am juz someone who takes away

joy n happiness between ppl.I am so hurt.

dis may be miie last entry lerhhs...read

everything I had posted...Dun bother abt

miie.I AM DAMN SICK NW.I will find a way

tuu get well soon.Ferget abt e race...I

think euu should ask some others tuu do it.

I really dunno.Fer nw,I am gonna shut miie

self up...When euu come back,I'll then

make miie decision on e race...Ppl juz sae

fer fun...sori...no offence.I am talking bout some ppl.Haix...lips service only..they dun

mean a single thing...I am sori...ppl left

tuu much painful memories wif miie.

everything is weighing miie down...

one word...tired.I have heard n seen

tuu much.Bibiana,I am sori...I should

have listened tuu euu.Nw,I am getting

so hurt coz of not listening tuu euu.I

am so sori.

haix...glenn,when euu get back,I

dunno if euu will do it...But,call miie.

We will keep in contact...Lets c how

true can dat be...Do euu really mean

wat euu sae?All ure promises?I hope

euu dun joke abt dis...I am serious...

I remember all e promises dat we had

made...euu can choose tuu break it or

fulfill it...euu broke miie hearrt twice.

we'll c how many times euu r gonna break

it then...ure promises...they mean a world

tuu miie.I am so upset..y?I am actually

waiting when I dunno y.I wait coz i promise

euu i would.But,I have kept miie promise.

Wat abt euu?How many promises will

euu break?Haix...gonna shut miie self up

till e dae euu return...wonder when miie

phone will ring?Do euu noe who i am?I

wanna hear dis again...but,I gues its all a dream...dreams dun come true..destiny...

fate...haix...I give up.

haix....16th november...I

hate euu.I am tired...I really

cant take it lerhhs...Y?Wat did

i DO TUU DESERVE DIS?No one

noes how much pain i am going

thru can?So many probs all weighing

on miie.

shit lahhx...I feel so shitty n disgusted.

I dunno y am I so silly.I should have

listened tuu miie frenz...Not doing wat

was hurting...Since young,I am treated lyk

a nobody at home...haix.Wats e point of

waiting when i noe i wont have it in e end?

haix...I am at a loss nw.Wat should I do?

I alrdy have enuf hurts..Muz I bear wif it?

I am tired...really tired...e world isnt dat cruel...I nw realise.It is e ppl, who r

cruel.I cant take e blow...I am sori...I

hate them.I am shutting miieself up from

nw on...Anyway,not all ppl care..

thx tuu those who care whole hearrtedly.

Ferget abt it if euu r juz lying..I hate

liars..I have enuf..tears have made miie

tuu tired,tuu late...lemmiie do wat i want.

Pls?Gudbye tuu someone...haix..

theUNLOVED.

it ends here.

♥ Blogged @

9:07 AM

♥ Wednesday, November 15, 2006

haix...10th dae lerhhs...so

slow can?Still got so long...

sigh...when will all miie burdens

be gone?haix...I want him back..

i miss him so much sia...haix...

he isnt feeling vari gud there either.

i hope he is ok...muz takkaire...

haix...where was I when he needed

miie?I feel so blessed tuu have such

a gud bro...haix.

kor,fergive miie yarhhx?Noeing dat

euu r not having fun there,I will

persevere even harder tuu wait fer

ure return...haix...sori.I feel so guilty.

So lucky tuu have a gud bro lyk euu.

guess euu r rite..where was I when

euu needed miie most?I am sori...pls

fergive miie.I MISS EUU.I LOVE EUU.

I NEED EUU.Come back pls...I neva

wantt tuu c euu turn ure bag on miie

again...

love euu,

miie.

♥ Blogged @

12:18 PM

♥ Tuesday, November 14, 2006

haix...9th dae lerhhs...I wonder

how is he...I juz wished he didnt call

on sundae nite..E call lasted fer less

than 10 mins...I miss hearing his voice.

if only we could talk fer hrs.

i am nw feeling wat i hoped

i didnt wantted tuu.It was

e feeling when he left on mondae.

haix...from wat i heard,I could hear dat

he wasnt enjoying himself.He is feeling

vari tired n drained.His voice sounded so

dead.Haix...hope he will takkaire...

didnt get e chance tuu tell him

I MISSED HIM...i was in e car wif

miie parents...Wat tuu do?I feel

so bad...separating him from us...

dis is wat happens in e end...

everyone is feeling so tired,

dead,drained...everything..haix.

but y?I really hate e idea of

separating ppl.It is so mean..

*glenn*

dis is fer ya...no matter wat

happens,euu have tuu persevere

till e dae euu return...I will wait

patiently...although i am sufferin'

juz fer ya...so,euu muz tuu kkayys?

Somedae,Sometime,Somehow...

we'll meet again.I will be here...

waiting fer euu.By then,no one can

separate euu,val n miie lerhhs.

I wont let euu go.

i miss euu.

i love euu.

i need euu.

♥ Blogged @

1:01 PM

♥ Monday, November 13, 2006

haix...8th dae lerhhs...I so miss

him,his voice...everything...I am

so sad...e whole cycle is repeating

itself...from e moment he left...

miss him so much...I want

him back soon...When?Will

he be back by miie bdae?

I want miie turtle...awww..

y?I was feeling better derhhs.

fer once,I wish he would call again...I

wanna hear him talk...I MISS HIM.

shouldnt have let him go...dis is wat

happens in e end...I want tuu c him again.

when he returns,I am gonna fulfill

e wish of his..Dat is,go c stars...

tried once b4 he left..saw nth...juz

talk only.haix...I wanna fulfill all e

things he told miie he wantted.I

promise him...I will.

so near yet so far..miie hearrt has broken

into bits...Dying fer him...Y?I juz cant be

happy without him...maybe,I can...but not

fer long...haix.I felt better on thursdae...

much better..till yesterdae.After LSP,

on e way sending val back,he called...

dat was when sadness came...Y?So hurt.

*KOR*

i miss euu

i love euu

i want euu

♥ Blogged @

12:54 PM

♥ Sunday, November 12, 2006

haix...7th dae lerhhs...I had received

a call from miie most-loved *kor*.I was

glad tuu hear from him...but,it only lasted

a while..nw,e cycle is repeating itself...I

am feeling wat i wished i didnt have tuu feel.

i didnt expect him tuu call.I was

so shocked..haix.I juz wished e

call lasted longer...He sounded so

tired.Poor-thing...haix...Wat can I

DO?I have no idea.Cant go there...

haix...anyway,went fer LSP 2dae...we had

e baptism of e holy spirit...haix...Expected,

I cried again...hmmms,so sad...I felt so sad.

haix...dun really noe wat dat feeling was.

but one thing,i love all of 'em.

its e last session 2dae...I think.

At e end of e whole session,we went

round e hall,hugging ppl we wanna

thank n stuffs.Funny...I wished time

stopped at dat point of time.

y does everything i enjoy,needs

tuu end so fast...I think back...

recalling e moments dat we had

spent...whoever it may be wif.

Anyone..I LOVE 'EM.

fer e session juz nw,I wanna thank

-valerie.

-iggy.

-wynee.

-jasmine.

-jelena.

anyone else i did not mention...They

noe who they r...They r ppl who lights

miie up.Thx ppl...I LOVE EUU.

*KOR*

iLOVEeuu.

iMISSeuu

♥ Blogged @

11:49 PM

♥ Saturday, November 11, 2006

haix...6th dae lerhhs..still no news. How sad..every single dae dat passed r filled wif tears..I can live a normal life without him... I MISS HIM SO MUCH....everything else doesnt matter if he is here..All i ever wantted or needed was HIM.It juz proves one thing...He is miie EVERYTHING. as e daes passes by,i wait.... hoping tuu receive news bout him.Y is it dat wat i had alwaes wantted,ppl would take it away? ALWAES. coz of his absense,i feel so alone, sad n stuffs...everything was worse than b4...his presence meant a lot tuu miie.I felt happier. Glenn... nth else is more important than euu. Euu r e motivator of miie life.Miie EVERYTHING...e reason dat i live... I MISS EUU,I LOVE EUU,I NEED EUU. ure absence made miie feel so uneasy. i felt insecure...everything would be e opposite if euu were here.I miss all e meowings dat we did.Remember e silly n stupid things we did.Memories.. they were all i needed tuu think bout euu.Wat e world may think...I dunno. but i noe fer one thing,wat they think doesnt matter.Being e best *KOR* I had ever had...euu were wat i couldnt afford tuu lose.Promises euu made... i could still remember clearly...e things n promises euu had made...Do euu really mean it?I wait fer ure answer...euu told miie tuu.Dun turn back on wateva euu said b4 leaving...Euu hate liars..I hate 'em tuu. nvm dat...but,alwaes remember dat I am waitin' fer ure return...e promises...I have no idea how long i can last...Ending here fer 2dae...continue 2ml..till euu return.

iLOVEeuu

iMISSeuu

iNEEDeuu

♥ Blogged @

3:50 PM

♥ Friday, November 10, 2006

haix...fifth dae 2dae...have not heard any news bout him.

Went tuu pasir ris yesterdae...miie frenz were there tuu

cheer miie up.THX...I LOVE EUU.I only felt better yesterdae.

I cant imagine wat would happen if they were not there sia.

i hope dat i will be able tuu remain dis way

till e dae he return...So sad lahhx...I MISS HIM

SO MUCH...boring life...haix...wat tuu do?i will

juz have tuu keep miie promise n wait fer him...

i wont last vari long though...I may give way anytime...It depends on

miie condition...haix...Without him,life is lyk living in hell...no diff from

leaving e world...haix..sad arhhx sad...I am filled wif tears...drained up

lerhhs...So tired of life...Rite nw,everything sucks can?

i juz wish he was here n all miie troubles wont

be such a burden...everything was bad...nw,its

WORSE...hard time trying tuu ferget memories

dat would only make miie sad...HURT.

iloveeuu

miie.

♥ Blogged @

12:12 PM

♥ Thursday, November 09, 2006

haix...fourth dae lerhhs...but still

haven got any news bout him....

so sad can?Gonna meet miie frenz

l8r then go pasir ris...we having bbq

in e evening...I dun feel lyk going...

wat tuu do?Its fer miie whole

class so juz go fer e sake of

them.I wont be lyk b4...haix.

Totally no mood lerhhs....sad.

euu said euu would be here when i need

euu.Where r euu nw?I MISS EUU SO

MUCH.Nothing is in place without euu.

Miie life is turning from bad tuu worse...

things will only be in place when

euu r here.haix...y?I am not at ease.

Fourth dae n tears,sadness fill miie

world still...I am waiting fer euu...

love euu so,

miie.

♥ Blogged @

9:18 AM

♥ Wednesday, November 08, 2006

haix...another dae has passed...

dis is e third dae lerhhs...sad:(

I went tuu sch dis am...nw write

lerhhs then go choir again...I

have no life without him...

when is he coming back?I am

missing him so much...I had neva

wantted tuu let him go...dis

is wat happens nw...E results of

letting go n missing him tuu much.

how sad...I cant seem tuu leave dis

matter alone...I am really drained...

crying dae after dae...haix...I MISS HIM.

I miss all e silly n stupid stuffs we wrote

or did..all dis memories..left behind wif

miie.I cant ferget...

looks lyk i really have tuu persevere

a lot arhhx...haix..so much pain n

hurts...i juz wished everything was

well...i miss e meowING dat we did.

he will always be miie best kor.

he was wif miie thru thick n thins...

if only he was here nw..Reading dis?

A thousand meows i would sae..I miss

his meows so much tuu.MEOW`i love euu'

LOVE EUU SO,

MIIE.

♥ Blogged @

11:41 AM

♥ Tuesday, November 07, 2006

hiie.Sadness is still e word....Second dae after he

had left fer PERTH...haix...Y?Wat does it mean?

I dunno when i will be able tuu c him again...*SIGH*

Everyone is feeling so down...

nth much happened 2dae...wat can i expect?I am

nw leaving a life without him...If he was here,things

would be much better.I wont be feeling wat i am

feeling nw....

maybe dis is wat god had planned...So sad...I juz

wanna tell him dat I MISS HIM SO MUCH!!!I noe nw

how it feels tuu let go of someone dear tuu euu.It

hurts real much...I dun think I want it anymore....

it is so unfair...Haix...Couldnt concentrate,focus

n stuffs...All dat i could think of was wat I hoped i

would ferget fer nw...Thinking of him only makes

miie feel worse...

arghhhhhh...is there anything i can do tuu ferget?

i dun think there is.All i can do is wait patiently,wif

sufferings,burdens n stuffs.I still have tuu wait fer dunno

how long more but i can sae dat it isnt gonna be so fast...

maybe in a month time or so...somewhere near xmas...

will he be back by miie bdae?i hope dat all miie gud

frenz will be here wif miie tuu celebrate miie bdae.

i dun wanna go thru it alone...haix...rite nw,I am depending

on one person tuu carry miie cross wif miie..haix...I wonder

how many of euu will do it...

haix...ppl thx fer being there when i needed euu all.I hope dat

of euu will stay as euu r fereva...coz of him...i have tuu suffer

dis hardships...persevere n keep miie promise bout waiting

fer his return...i dunno if i can make it...

no one noes exactly how i feel...but a few of euu,including him,

noes more than e others...I am so tired...energy drained...due

tuu tuu much crying...i dunno how n wat tuu do...Almost everydae

I cry...coz of him...it is so hurting...

Glenn,dis is fer euu...

In times of troubles,sadness n stuffs,thx

fer being there fer miie...Nw dat euu r gone

fer quite sometime,well,i guess i need tuu let

euu noe how I feel...I feel so drained...tired.

All e stupid n silly things dat we wrote or did,I

miss them all.

Most importantly,I MISS EUU.I told euu dat I cant

imagine miie life without euu b4 euu leave.Do euu

remember dis?i hope euu do.I am feeling moodless

rite nw...dis is how i feel when euu r not around.

I guess euu believe miie nw.Neva felt dis way b4...

so,nw dat i have told euu a little,will euu ever ps

miie again?Dun leave us alone here anymore kaess?

i neva wanna let euu go anymore...It isnt as easy

as euu imagined it tuu be.I tot dat i could live as

free as euu said...but,no.things r wat i expected...

if euu r reading dis nw,i want euu tuu noe dat i cant

go on without euu.When euu r here,I may be sad...

but at least,euu r here fer miie.Nw euu r not even here,

ask val how i have been...*sigh*it really isnt easy...

its painful..

euu r all dat i need..e motivator of miie life.It is

fer euu dat I continue living...Euu r e best kor* i ever

had...I have not fergotten ure promises...we had not

i will wait...wait till e dae when euu r back.By then,

i promise euu,I will go wif euu...We'll c e stars we had

wantted tuu c...

iMISSeuu//*

LOVES,

-uremeii[miie]

♥ Blogged @

6:30 PM

♥ Monday, November 06, 2006

haix....sad sad sad.Y?I feel so lonely,sad,lost...

All I noe is dat not many ppl will noe how i am feel rite nw.

HURT is e word....It all started dis mornin'...

I woke up at 630am....I was hoping time would slow down.

I was starting tuu feel so down.Then,went off tuu meet Valerie at her

house bus stop.Miie mom then drove us 2 e

air port...we were gonna c someone off.

Y?When we reach there,we met glenn,raphael n glenn's

dad...Dat was when i noe not much time was left.

He had tuu leave...Perth-wonder when he will be back...

coz i am missin' him so much...I MISS MIIE KOR!!!

Till nw,I am still 'moodless'.I dun wanna joke fer nw...

I dun have e mood tuu do dat.Y?One obstacle after another

really makes miie wanna die.I cant...coz all dat i promised him,

I will have tuu do it.Can someone pls lend miie ure shoulder

lyk someone did?

-LIFE-

Wat is it?Is e meaning of dis suffering?I dun wanna

feel dis way anymore.I had enough.I am sori...

If SOMEONE were tuu read dis,pls reply or tag miie

kaess?I wanna noe when he is coming back....

iMISShim

♥ Blogged @

2:42 PM